English Language for

[Saunanudel]

Hi,

I thought I'd open this Topic because:

A: I can't be bothered to write german all the time! :plemplem:

B: For People who want to practice :grins:

C: Scooterforum. Com is dead, so come on all you Brits!

English is good for my Karma :plemplem:

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von Saunanudel

[tintifax]

I think you have a serious drug problem !

[Saunanudel]

What me?

I'm completely sane, honest!

Beer and Tobacco and nothing else. If id do drugs I'd probabnly end up looking a bit like this and in the end this

[Ultraschorsch]

Plus, you seem to have way too much time on your hands...

[art_65]

i hope nobody will understand u wrong, but this topic seems a little crazy....

but i'll tell u one thing: i'm serious...this topic is just the beginning of "the new english-age" in the gsf.

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von art_65

[amazombi]

Beer and Tobacco and nothing else.

isn't that exactly what tinitfax was saying? certainly does sound like a serious drug problem to me.

[tintifax]

In my humble opinion the Threadstarter has also a severe mental problem.

He also seems to be addicted to the germanscooterforum.

If i´d have some free time, i would never post something offtopic in this community ! :wasntme:

[Fleetenkieker]

Tobacco and nothing else

is it a new name for weed or shit???

i think you are bored, go out and enjoy the sun

the fleet

[fabrocker]

so let's start off with a little english joke:

why was 6 afraid of 7?

because 7 8 9!

uhhhh..damn, that one hurts.

greetings,

the fab

[amazombi]

I'm amazed, nay, deeply impressed. that will teach the brits a lesson. they have considered us germans creatures utterly devoid of humour for the longest time, i dare say.

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von amazombi

[fabrocker]

...nay....utterly devoid...

i'm wonderstruck, not to say utmost amused!

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von fabrocker

[amazombi]

they didn't make me read all that old stuff for nothing, did they?

[Saunanudel]

@ Ultarschorsch

I do indeed have way to much time on my hands and also way to much in my head at the moment

@ Tintifax

Being Mental is one of my primary Attributes and if more people wuz as mental as me, the GSF wouldn't have gotten so boreing in the last 2 Years ( .

@ All I don't do Weed and I don't need anything to be :plemplem:

Actually I do confess that these smilies keep haunting me. found one in the Cellar the other day.... or was it a Spider?...

[fabrocker]

what are ye refering to?

[amazombi]

that you in the picture? come off it, mate, never, not even in a week of sundays will anybody believe you are not on something much stronger than alcohol and tabaco.

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von amazombi

[Fleetenkieker]

i also have a joke 4 u:

A rabbi and a shepherd are lerning english and have one last examination:

Build a rhyme with the word "Timbuktu"!

and the rabbi begins:

I was a babbi all my life, i had no children and no wife,

I read my tura through an through on my way to timbuktu!

the teacher was inspired and so the shepherd was plaesed to rhyme.

and the shepherd said:

When Tim and I to Bristol went, we saw three ladies in a tent.

they were three an we were two, so i booked one and tim booked two!

[Saunanudel]

@ amazombi: :uargh: Allright! Allright! I confess! I had a cup of coffee this morning

[amazombi]

didn't i know it? can't trick me when it comes to that, i can spot one of you filthy scum-addicts from a mile. so what do you intend to do about that? continue hanging out in front of our german kindergardens waiting for the next "customer"? no fucking way, we all know your evil physiognomy now, better beware.

[Saunanudel]

@amazombi: LOL You got me there mate. Now i'm scared less

On account of the fact, that I may have, arroused your suspicions that I am a smoker of home-grown aggricultural plant-life, here is my defence. I can say for myself that, I do not trust gras or those that grow it.

Most of the people that manufacture these things, i would refer to as being a curious subspecies of the human race i would define as "People of the Tree-hugging sort". Furthermore, the only way anyone will see me hugging a tree, is when I'm at a Rallye, slightly more than (but not completely) drunk, and I wish to Hug some gal and I, most regretably, walk into the tree

Reflecting on past experiences, with this very dangerous product; I can only say that, were I to smoke something of this kind, it wouldn't take 20 minutes before I find myself slumbering in a coma with a flower sticking in my due to some cunt wanting a laugh at my expense

In respect to the picture of my undoubtly handsome self. I confess, I feel the need, to rise above the sprawling mass of society, through scootering culture and express this in the way I look. Indeed whilst some people might describe my Indian copy of a decent scooter with the term "rat", I complement this with my looks

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von Saunanudel

[gonzo]

In the men's room at work, the boss placed a sign directly above the sink. It had a single word on it: "Think!"

The next day, when he went to the men's room, he looked at the sign, and

right below it, immediately above the soap dispenser, someone had carefully lettered another sign which read, "Thoap!"

- gonzo

[gonzo]

Ooops, I have to get rid of this one too.

The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. On the other hand, the French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans. The Italians drink lots of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans- Conclusion: Eat & drink what you like. It's speaking English that kills you.

Doesn`t that make you think different about English in general?

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von gonzo

[Saunanudel]

I seem to have noticed that various riders of that, very fine scooter "The Lambretta", have assembled here to celebrate the language, spoken by those that invented the scooter scene (the germans seem to have done it better)

And I (who rides a scooter, where I have to put my foot down when it falls to the right at the traffic lights) furthermore, feel the need to bow my head to such an excellent scooter for scooterists. Why, when scooterists become known for a one way ride to the rallye, it prompts a wise man to say "You drink and party one hell of a lot more, if you know you'll ride back with the ADAC in the monrning!"

Bearbeitet 29. Juni 2004 von Saunanudel

[amazombi]

And I (who rides a scooter, where I have to put my foot down when it falls to the right at the traffic lights)

heard that rumour time and again, and at first i was tempted to believe that lambrettas by the sheer excellence of their design would actually not even need a mainstand when parked (which is halftrue at least if a handy wall is somewhere nearby), but tell you what: after having tried a couple of times with my feet up i had learned the hard way. what's the lesson to be learned: both lambrettas and vespas come from italy, have two wheels, rather dodgy out-of-date two stroke engines and tend to break down slightly more often than your average mercedes benz. sounds (to me) as if they had quite a lot in common, including the type of socialy outcast character on the bar prepared to cover long distances on engines which are not powerfull enough to make for a decent starter motor on a proper bike.

only commented on that because i still haven't recovered from the headache your shockingly inapt characterisation of your appearance has caused.

[GL Sesche]

Well there goes another joke (a canadian one)

Why is american beer like making love in a canoe?

It's f*cking close to water

Kokanee rules

[Saunanudel]

@ GL Sesche:

I heard that on the first time watching Monty pythons - Live at the Hollywood Bowl. Are you sure it's a canadian joke? Take a wider view, Canada is part of the great, big, happy Comonwealth

[GL Sesche]

@Saunanudel

Well, the first time I heard that joke was '97 in Canada. But I guess

it could also be from somewhere else, but canoes are "pretty"

common in Canada, so I guessed the joke originates there.

I also found out that jokes, which I thought where "swiss" jokes

are told everywhere, here the good ones are the swiss and the

loosers the austrian (no offense )the same joke

goes with germans and dutch, canadians and americans, swedes

and norwegian people ...

Aloha

[amazombi]

(no offense  )

what's the shite with "no offense meant" supposed to be? the whole thing may wear a friendly and jocular face, but deep down we all know there's something fundamentally wrong with the austrians. and with the french. and with the nepalese. and with the geezers from burkina faso. come to think of it i'd be prepared to swear i'm the only sane person i have ever met.

[Saunanudel]

@Amazombi I am perfectly willing to believe you think you are the only sane person you ever met. :plemplem: This, however brings me to the conclusion that you have either, never met anyone else or you are in fact, the sort of person that goes into the classroom, gets under the desk and sits there chanting "I'm an Orange and Oranges don't do exams :plemplem: !"

[amazombi]

you do know me, mate, both suggestions bang on. i really am impressed.

[Saunanudel]

I have recently been thinking of, why, I always drink so much when I' m on the Run. I came to the conclusion that, in a state of absolute sobriety, I could not bear the beautiful lawn being ruined by drunken louts, parking their Vehicles on it. :plemplem:

Yeah...yeah...yeah...Deep down I'm a nature loving hippie, spreading tolllerance and peace wherever I go

:grins: :plemplem:

Natuaraly everyone I meet has the same peacful nature and makes me think of brirds and bees and fluffy, white clouds.

:haeh: :plemplem: :plemplem: :plemplem:

My psychiatrist tells me I am far more sane than he is and....'ere be off...hate bloody smilies harrassing me Bloody smilies you'd better watch it!!! And don't you try getting away....I know wher you live mate!!!

Bloody smilie...your'e so ugly the last time you got some piece of ass was when your hand slipped through the toilet-paper!!!!! :haeh: Oooooh they're bloody everywhere the little buggers and I think they're following me....

Help!!!!????

Mum!!!!????

Flossy the sheep!!!???

Anyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!??